the media is speaking about about HIV discrimination. can I get a hallelujah?
/
Yesterday, I saw a blip on my FB feed about ex-NBA guy Sterling sticking his other foot in his mouth during his I'm-not-a-racist interview with Anderson Cooper.
And I sighed.
I sighed because the blip mentioned Magic Johnson, and I guessed that Sterling's newest comments were anti-HIV rather than anti-black. I sighed because I suspected that all the people who spoke out about racism with Sterling's initial comments would just gloss over the HIV discrimination, considering that sort of slur to be okay.
I was wrong.
The ruckus probably wouldn't have been so great if it weren't riding the coattails of a bigger story, but major news outlets are talking about HIV discrimination. Granted, a Google search for "HIV Sterling" only comes up with a fraction of the results you get when searching "racist Sterling," but I'll take it.
I meet adoptive families with HIV+ kids all. the. time.
Why? Because, as one of the rare families who is open about our child's HIV status, they seek us out. Unlike families whose children have cerebral palsy or epilepsy, the diagnoses of two of our other children, HIV families usually stay quiet. From my experience in person with these families and online in private forums, I'd guess that 80% keep the diagnosis a secret from most - or even all - of their family and friends. They know HIV ignorance and the resulting discrimination are real, even though the risk of contracting it from our kids isn't, and they keep quiet to protect their loved ones.
It's sweet for our kids to know each other, to know that HIV is something other kids have, to know that their diagnosis isn't shameful and doesn't define them as individuals.
To know that - whether the news acknowledges it or not - comments like Sterling's are just plain ignorant and mean.
Let me pause for a moment to answer the question that might be bouncing around your head: isn't it different, though, for my child who was born with HIV by no choice of his/her own and for Magic Johnson and others who acquired HIV through lifestyle choices?
In a word, no. Say what?!? Here's the thing: None of us are without sin, and while your life's consequences might not include HIV, it wouldn't be right or fair or loving to dismiss you because of your past mistakes and whatever resulted from those. So, please, before you defend HIV discrimination for someone who chose the action that led to HIV, just stop. Because regardless of how the virus was contracted, I can promise you this: no one purposefully chooses HIV.
And no one deserves discrimination as a result of an HIV status they can't change now.
Now, back to Sterling's comments and the media attention around them...
From USA Today:
As the mama of a kid who is too young to care about Sterling's comments yet, this makes me smile and gives me hope that maybe, just maybe, society won't be so hard on my child due to a completely manageable health condition.
And I sighed.
I sighed because the blip mentioned Magic Johnson, and I guessed that Sterling's newest comments were anti-HIV rather than anti-black. I sighed because I suspected that all the people who spoke out about racism with Sterling's initial comments would just gloss over the HIV discrimination, considering that sort of slur to be okay.
I was wrong.
The ruckus probably wouldn't have been so great if it weren't riding the coattails of a bigger story, but major news outlets are talking about HIV discrimination. Granted, a Google search for "HIV Sterling" only comes up with a fraction of the results you get when searching "racist Sterling," but I'll take it.
I meet adoptive families with HIV+ kids all. the. time.
Why? Because, as one of the rare families who is open about our child's HIV status, they seek us out. Unlike families whose children have cerebral palsy or epilepsy, the diagnoses of two of our other children, HIV families usually stay quiet. From my experience in person with these families and online in private forums, I'd guess that 80% keep the diagnosis a secret from most - or even all - of their family and friends. They know HIV ignorance and the resulting discrimination are real, even though the risk of contracting it from our kids isn't, and they keep quiet to protect their loved ones.
It's sweet for our kids to know each other, to know that HIV is something other kids have, to know that their diagnosis isn't shameful and doesn't define them as individuals.
To know that - whether the news acknowledges it or not - comments like Sterling's are just plain ignorant and mean.
Let me pause for a moment to answer the question that might be bouncing around your head: isn't it different, though, for my child who was born with HIV by no choice of his/her own and for Magic Johnson and others who acquired HIV through lifestyle choices?
In a word, no. Say what?!? Here's the thing: None of us are without sin, and while your life's consequences might not include HIV, it wouldn't be right or fair or loving to dismiss you because of your past mistakes and whatever resulted from those. So, please, before you defend HIV discrimination for someone who chose the action that led to HIV, just stop. Because regardless of how the virus was contracted, I can promise you this: no one purposefully chooses HIV.
And no one deserves discrimination as a result of an HIV status they can't change now.
Now, back to Sterling's comments and the media attention around them...
From USA Today:
An interview that was supposed to be an attempt at rehabilitation instead had Los Angeles Clippers owner Donald Sterling facing fresh rebukes as he went from apologizing for recent racist remarks to slamming Magic Johnson, repeatedly bringing up the ex-NBA star's HIV status and calling him an unfit role model for children.In a headline from The Washington Post:
Donald Sterling: Magic Johnson ‘should be ashamed of himself’ for having HIVFrom Sports Illustrated:
Disgraced Clippers owner Donald Sterling launched into an extended tirade against Magic Johnson in an interview with CNN, saying that the Lakers legend should be “ashamed” of being HIV-positive and suggesting that he hasn’t financially supported minority communities.From CNN:
In a conference call, Clippers Coach Doc Rivers said of Sterling's comments, "That doesn't sound like much of an apology to me."I hate to give any more publicity to this whole Sterling mess, but I wanted to write this post to publicly say WELL DONE! to media outlets for not just ignoring HIV discrimination. If they had skimmed over it, they would be saying, "Race, don't you dare discriminate! But HIV? Go ahead." But they didn't.
As the mama of a kid who is too young to care about Sterling's comments yet, this makes me smile and gives me hope that maybe, just maybe, society won't be so hard on my child due to a completely manageable health condition.
~+~
I wrote this article before I realized that today a story about our family - and HIV discrimination - would go live on the Today show's website. Here 'tis. A few details are amiss, but the basics are accurate... especially the part at the end about our hope that the friends who have reacted in fear to our child's HIV would have a change of heart because we love them, no matter what.