Special needs ministry Q&A: Accommodations, distractions in worship services, choir, and youth trips
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For the past two days I've been answering a list of questions posed to me in the comments section of one of my first policy-related posts. Today I'll finish with that list, but I would LOVE to answer any lingering questions you have, so feel free to pose some in the comments section or send me an email at shannon@theworksofgoddisplayed.com! To see the other Q&As from this week, go here and here.
I say discuss instead of expect because if a church leader or a caregiver has a specific accommodation in mind that they expect, then the conversation begins with the accommodation rather than the need. It's prudent to begin those conversations with the need; in other words, why is an accommodation needed? Then - together - the church and the family can partner to figure out the best accommodation. God established the family, and God established the church; he is in favor of both, and we ought to operate in unity not opposition.
The model we see from Christ - for example, when he turns to the woman who has been bleeding as soon as she touches his robe - isn't to treat every person in the same exact way. Fair doesn't mean the same. And, more important, treating all people in exactly the same way regardless of their needs isn't following the model Christ provided for us.
I don't like the word required here. Any decision about removing someone from a typical setting - even when an alternate one is being provided, like a baby room or cry room or other room in which the service is being broadcast to screens or TVs - should be a discussion between the church leaders and the family, not an edict from the powers that be in the church. I do think it's a wise idea to offer an alternate setting, not for the sake of providing the church with a place to hide those families but for the sake of offering options to the families, some of whom feel uncomfortable staying in church with even the most minor vocalizations.
Another key point to consider here is how friendly your church is to kids. Some churches establish so many programs for kids during the service that is becomes clear that the church leaders expect kids to be in those programs instead of in the sanctuary/worship center with their parents. In our family, we bring our four-year-old daughter to "big church" with us, and then she goes to Sunday school after the service we attend (and during our second service) while we coordinate Access Ministry. I've found that churches where children are included in worship services are more likely to be churches where people with special needs are embraced too, because perceived distractions can come with both groups. (I say perceived distractions because - like beauty - distractions are often in the eye of the beholder. Sometimes the distraction is a problem, and sometimes the perception of the beholder is the real problem.)
Here's an idea from our church: We have a team of vocalists that is audition-only to lead some of our services; if we have a solo, then it's usually someone from that team. We also have a choir, which is open to anyone. Someone who has difficulty articulating, carrying a tune, or expressing himself verbally could participate in the choir.
At our church, we have youth with special needs at our week-long summer camp (which is an overnight camp in a neighboring state), and we have kids with special needs on our middle school tubing trip and our high school ski trip. We have youth with special needs on mission trips. Disability isn't an excluding criteria, though some adaptations and extra supports are sometimes necessary.
Yes, liability usually increases when you include people with special needs, but as I wrote yesterday, liability issues arise whenever anyone shows up at your church. Extra assistance/supervision may be necessary to limit liability and increase safety. And much communication will be necessary to make sure all parties - leaders, the youth in question, the parents, other kids, and so on - are partners in inclusion.
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This wraps up my Q&A for the week, and tomorrow I'll have a guest post from a parent. Please feel free to leave a comment anytime with other questions, and I'll do my best to answer them! And, as usual, if you have a different answer than what I've given above, chime in with that too so we can all benefit from your perspective.
I hope you're having a great Thursday!
Is it unfair to expect accommodation for an adult when there are no other adults requesting it?No. If it's a needed accommodation - in other words, if the adult can't be included in your church without it - then it's unfair not to discuss it.
I say discuss instead of expect because if a church leader or a caregiver has a specific accommodation in mind that they expect, then the conversation begins with the accommodation rather than the need. It's prudent to begin those conversations with the need; in other words, why is an accommodation needed? Then - together - the church and the family can partner to figure out the best accommodation. God established the family, and God established the church; he is in favor of both, and we ought to operate in unity not opposition.
The model we see from Christ - for example, when he turns to the woman who has been bleeding as soon as she touches his robe - isn't to treat every person in the same exact way. Fair doesn't mean the same. And, more important, treating all people in exactly the same way regardless of their needs isn't following the model Christ provided for us.
what if the person vocalizes loudly during a church service or is distracting by their movements or other appearances? should they be required to go to the 'baby room', 'tv room'?This is a hard one to answer without knowing what "vocalizing loudly" and "distracting by their movements or other appearances" means. In some instances, the distraction is problematic, and in some instances, the problem is that people get hot and bothered over minor distractions and just need to get over their own mentality of comfort. Is the vocalizing during music as the person's own special way of making a joyful noise unto the Lord? Or is the person shouting during the sermon so that the pastor cannot be heard?
I don't like the word required here. Any decision about removing someone from a typical setting - even when an alternate one is being provided, like a baby room or cry room or other room in which the service is being broadcast to screens or TVs - should be a discussion between the church leaders and the family, not an edict from the powers that be in the church. I do think it's a wise idea to offer an alternate setting, not for the sake of providing the church with a place to hide those families but for the sake of offering options to the families, some of whom feel uncomfortable staying in church with even the most minor vocalizations.
Another key point to consider here is how friendly your church is to kids. Some churches establish so many programs for kids during the service that is becomes clear that the church leaders expect kids to be in those programs instead of in the sanctuary/worship center with their parents. In our family, we bring our four-year-old daughter to "big church" with us, and then she goes to Sunday school after the service we attend (and during our second service) while we coordinate Access Ministry. I've found that churches where children are included in worship services are more likely to be churches where people with special needs are embraced too, because perceived distractions can come with both groups. (I say perceived distractions because - like beauty - distractions are often in the eye of the beholder. Sometimes the distraction is a problem, and sometimes the perception of the beholder is the real problem.)
should people who have difficulty articulating, carry a tune, and/or are non-verbal be allowed to join the choir?I say yes, but this is a conversation you should have with whoever leads the choir at your church. Special needs ministry advocates should never be antagonists; we don't push our ministry perspective at the expense of others. Inclusion doesn't just mean including people with special needs at your church; it means including all ministries in your church in those inclusion efforts.
Here's an idea from our church: We have a team of vocalists that is audition-only to lead some of our services; if we have a solo, then it's usually someone from that team. We also have a choir, which is open to anyone. Someone who has difficulty articulating, carrying a tune, or expressing himself verbally could participate in the choir.
should youth w/special needs be allowed to participate in youth trips? what about liability & extra assistance/supervision?Just as I recommend above that a decision should be made about the choir with the choir director and not unilaterally from the special needs ministry coordinator, here a decision should be made with the youth pastor/director and the parents. What is the purpose of the trip? How could the youth with special needs be included safely? What barriers exist to full participation? How can those be overcome? Do the parents even want their child to participate? I can't offer a yes or no here, but I can tell you that it's a conversation worth having and that anytime a "no" is given for something like this, we ought to offer a "yes" in another area (i.e. "on the high school ski trip all the kids are out on the slopes for most of the time, so your child who is unable to ski would probably feel excluded and might not have the supervision necessary, but here is a place we would love to include him...").
At our church, we have youth with special needs at our week-long summer camp (which is an overnight camp in a neighboring state), and we have kids with special needs on our middle school tubing trip and our high school ski trip. We have youth with special needs on mission trips. Disability isn't an excluding criteria, though some adaptations and extra supports are sometimes necessary.
Yes, liability usually increases when you include people with special needs, but as I wrote yesterday, liability issues arise whenever anyone shows up at your church. Extra assistance/supervision may be necessary to limit liability and increase safety. And much communication will be necessary to make sure all parties - leaders, the youth in question, the parents, other kids, and so on - are partners in inclusion.
~+~
This wraps up my Q&A for the week, and tomorrow I'll have a guest post from a parent. Please feel free to leave a comment anytime with other questions, and I'll do my best to answer them! And, as usual, if you have a different answer than what I've given above, chime in with that too so we can all benefit from your perspective.
I hope you're having a great Thursday!