Fridays from the Families: Reflections on VBS planning with special needs in mind
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I am so happy to welcome Becky back to the blog! She was my very first "Fridays from the Families" guest blogger - writing then about helping kids with special needs adjust to church renovations - and it's a blessing to have her join us once again. She blogs about life with Mozart, Picasso, and Princess at paintingwithpicasso.blogspot.com.
We’re a family with 3 children, one of whom has special needs. Our children attended 2 different VBS’s (Vacation Bible Schools) this summer and I wanted to try to gather a few thoughts that might help you as parents or as VBS leaders prepare for a child’s successful attendance at VBS.
We’re a family with 3 children, one of whom has special needs. Our children attended 2 different VBS’s (Vacation Bible Schools) this summer and I wanted to try to gather a few thoughts that might help you as parents or as VBS leaders prepare for a child’s successful attendance at VBS.
- Nighttime VBS’s are tough – it’s been a long day for the leaders, and it’s been a long day for the kids. It’s been a longer day for kids struggling with special needs, and it’s likely that they’ll be getting to bed a little later than usual each night. I’m not suggesting you change to daytime VBS’s (although, have you considered that option? My kids attended a daytime one & it was great – for them and me!), but rather bear in mind that kids with special needs are often are heavily reliant upon a schedule, and VBS is new to their schedule. Often the evenings are “down time” for kids with special needs, after long days of therapies and regularly-planned activities. It will probably take a couple nights for them to really understand this change to their routine – and by that time, the week is nearly done.
- If there’s a way to offer an “open house” for families of kids with special needs, prior to your VBS, it would be helpful. This would give the kids and their parents a chance to walk through all the areas that will be used, see the props, know what will happen at each station, meet the staff, take pictures to assist in picture schedules, and experience the environment in a small group rather than in a large group where they’re more likely to feel a little bit more out of control. This will also give an opportunity for families not associated with your church, to walk through and see how their child will best be able to participate in your VBS. For example, do you have a way for their wheelchair-bound child to get from one floor to another? Will they slip on slick floors with their crutches/braces? Are there water fountains that their children can easily access? These are all questions that you, as the church worker, know the answer to. However, these are things that we, as parents, would rather see for ourselves, than trust someone to answer for us.
- Children with special needs often do not like walking into/arriving to large crowds of people. Consider having the option of children with special needs arriving at your VBS before everyone else. For example, if you plan to have kids arrive at 6:15pm, be strict with this time – don’t open the doors before then. Allow children with special needs to enter the building a few minutes earlier (10-15 minutes earlier), possibly through a separate entrance so they can avoid the crowd and already be seated when you open the door for the other children.
- Ask questions.
- Parents – ask ALL the questions you need to ask in order to feel comfortable with sending your child to a particular church’s VBS. Feel free to call the church sometime prior to VBS and setting up a meeting with the VBS leader to discuss your child’s particular needs.
- For VBS leaders/workers – ask all the questions you need to in order to feel comfortable caring for a child. Also, be willing to field questions from parents of children with special needs. We, as parents of special needs kids, are definitely NOT looking for free babysitting. We have a tough time trusting our kids to school staff, therapists, and all the other regular people in our lives – we’re sure not out to dump our kids on some local church people to enjoy some quiet time. What we want is some normalcy for our children – an attempt to let them participate in those things that the neighborhood kids enjoy.
- Parents – if your child seems insecure consider staying in the building. So pack a book for the first night, or something else that will occupy your time. Many children are nervous being left alone and it may help you, the child, and the staff, just to know you’re in the building.
- Parents – if you know of another local family with special needs, whose children are participating in the VBS you’re attending, consider volunteering and then swapping kids for VBS – your kids could be in your friend’s group, their kids could be in your group. Often our kids will do better with another adult who understands the needs and knows how to help. Unfortunately, this would mean less free time for you, but it may be just the thing that’s needed to allow both families to come away from VBS having a successful week.
- Leaders – as mentioned above, the children with special needs are likely to be tired by the time the VBS program comes around. Many children have multiple therapies and have already worked hard physically, mentally and emotionally. Please keep that in mind. The summer schedule is usually different than the school-year schedule and that takes some getting used to. Additionally, all of their “normally-scheduled things” (therapy, appointments, etc.) may be at different times over the summer adding additional confusion to an already mixed-up schedule.
- Leaders - If you’re working to integrate the kids with special needs in with the other kids, you may want to consider adding one or two people to any group that has a child with special needs. This will allow for someone to walk a little more slowly with a tired child, or to sit down and take a break with a child during active times, yet still engage that child and make sure that they don’t feel left out. The saddest thing is to see a child who cannot participate in an activity sitting alone on the sidelines. It may not seem like a big deal at the time, but what you’re ultimately telling that child is, “You’re not as important as these others.” Try to make sure that all of what you do focuses on the preciousness of each child.
- Leaders - If you have a class comprised of only children with special needs, make sure you’re adequately staffed. This goes without saying. Remind your crew of confidentiality issues, safety concerns, and be vigilant.
- Leaders - Have fun! If you’re having fun (while watching the kids and doing all you need to as a leader), the kids will have a great time as well!
- Leaders - Pray. Plan. Prepare. Plan a little more. Prepare even more. And don’t stop praying! You have a unique opportunity to reach some wonderful children with the good news of Jesus!