Love these comments.

One of my favorite blogs is Love That Max. I don't think she's a Christian, but Ellen is a momma who loves her son and who writes incisively about parenting a child with special needs.

Two days ago she posted about what moms of kids with special needs want other moms to know. As usual, the post is insightful and the comments are just as meaty. And her post has a sister post over at Scary Mommy in which readers are invited to leave comments with questions they have for parents of kids with special needs. Once again, good post with great comments.

Read 'em. And leave a comment here with your favorite.

Here are a couple that caught my eye and heart:

I'd want them to know that a "typical social invitation" would be the world to my child (with autism). It would be great if a "neurotypical child" invited my child to have lunch with him at school. Or invited her out to a movie. Or just said hello and started a conversation in the hallways. Those little things mean a lot.

And this:

When you see a child melting down in a public place, don't assume it is lack of good parenting that causes this. My son has high functioning autism, and anything can set him into one of these tantrums, lights, noise, not getting his way. When you look at me like I should know how to control my child better than that, it cuts me to the core. Remember, you are seeing this for 10 minutes. It is my life every day, sometimes all day. Smile instead.

And this:

I am not special because I have a "special needs" child. I'm just doing what I have to do - and you would do the same. Don't make me a heroine...or think I have all the answers...because I am not, and I don't.

I WANT you to talk about your problems with your kids. Gavin's medical and development issues don't trump your potty training dilemmas. It actually hurts my feelings when you assume that your problems aren't as important as mine.

And, finally, this:

1. Monkey has a physical disability, but that does not mean he is delayed in all areas. Don't be condescending when talking to him or assume that the fact that he has physical delays means he has delays in other areas as well.
2. Do not ask us within five minutes of meeting us what is "wrong" with him. In fact, refrain from using the W - word altogether. Instead, take the time to get to know Monkey as the whole person he is before inquiring about is disability. You wouldn't want strangers coming up to ask you intrusive questions about your area(s) of weakness or medical history; my son deserves the same respect.
3. It's OK to offer to help. Even if I turn you down, I will appreciate it.
4. You should not feel sorry for my son or for me. In fact, your pity irks me and damages him. All it does is send him the message that there is something "wrong" with him - and there isn't.
5. It's OK to make friends with my son, and encourage your children to do the same. He may have some differences, but he's more or less like every other little boy. At the same time, please do not act as if you're doing a noble deed by befriending the "poor little disabled boy." My son has a lot to offer, and you are just as lucky to have him as a friend as he is to have you.
6. My son is just as perfect as yours, and yours is as imperfect as mine.

 But that's enough from me. Go to Love That Max and Scary Mommy, and read the comments yourself.